Dear Thatha,
Monday, August 26, 2019Dear Thatha,
It's been 67 days since you went to a better place.
Every single day I think of something I want to share with you.
I wanted to tell you when I drove myself to college for the first time. I thought that would make you proud.
I made Korean pancakes one day and wanted to share them with you.
Whenever my dad or my mom scolded me I wanted to tell you about it because I know you would've taken my side.
Sometimes I just want to run to you and give you a big hug because you gave the warmest hugs and then I realise I can't do all that and it breaks me.
Everyone says it gets better with time but I'm sat here bawling my eyes out as I write this wondering if time does heal this?
Whenever I visited you unannounced, your face lit up, it's something I will never forget, it moved me in ways you can never imagine. The fact that you were so happy just to see me, blew my mind and made me feel like the most loved person in the entire world.
I always thought I've never felt the unconditional love people talk about in songs, but then you made sure I did.
You calling me 'Sanakka' still echoes every single day. It was always so funny that you took it upon yourself to call me Akka because the rest of the youngsters didn't and funnily enough, it stuck. Recently someone called me 'Sanakka' and it just didn't feel right because it didn't come from you.
You only saw the good in people. Even when it came to one of those spam messages that you shouldn't reply to, I don't know how you did it but you still only saw the good side.
The way you respected women was always stunning, I mean, you sometimes don't see that in kids my age. I've always been so proud to call you my grandad but that always made me burst with pride.
The hole you've left in our lives is so substantial, you can't not feel it.
Every single day I think about you and I miss you so much more than words can say.
It hurts.
At the same time, I'm so glad you're not in pain anymore.
Of course, I wish we had more time together, but I don't think any amount of time would've been enough.
I turn 20 soon and as much as science tells me otherwise, I'd like to think wherever you are, you'll be by my side as I embark on a new journey of sorts.
I hope I make proud.
I hope I can spread kindness and happiness the way you did.
I also hope you're happy and at peace.
Thank you for being the greatest grandad. I'm not sure about what I did to deserve you, but I'm so grateful for all the years, all the jokes, all the conversations, all the food, just all the tiny things we shared together.
I will never and can't ever forget you.
Love you forever.
Without Wax,
Your Sanakka
It's been 67 days since you went to a better place.
Every single day I think of something I want to share with you.
I wanted to tell you when I drove myself to college for the first time. I thought that would make you proud.
I made Korean pancakes one day and wanted to share them with you.
Whenever my dad or my mom scolded me I wanted to tell you about it because I know you would've taken my side.
Sometimes I just want to run to you and give you a big hug because you gave the warmest hugs and then I realise I can't do all that and it breaks me.
Everyone says it gets better with time but I'm sat here bawling my eyes out as I write this wondering if time does heal this?
Whenever I visited you unannounced, your face lit up, it's something I will never forget, it moved me in ways you can never imagine. The fact that you were so happy just to see me, blew my mind and made me feel like the most loved person in the entire world.
I always thought I've never felt the unconditional love people talk about in songs, but then you made sure I did.
You calling me 'Sanakka' still echoes every single day. It was always so funny that you took it upon yourself to call me Akka because the rest of the youngsters didn't and funnily enough, it stuck. Recently someone called me 'Sanakka' and it just didn't feel right because it didn't come from you.
You only saw the good in people. Even when it came to one of those spam messages that you shouldn't reply to, I don't know how you did it but you still only saw the good side.
The way you respected women was always stunning, I mean, you sometimes don't see that in kids my age. I've always been so proud to call you my grandad but that always made me burst with pride.
The hole you've left in our lives is so substantial, you can't not feel it.
Every single day I think about you and I miss you so much more than words can say.
It hurts.
At the same time, I'm so glad you're not in pain anymore.
Of course, I wish we had more time together, but I don't think any amount of time would've been enough.
I turn 20 soon and as much as science tells me otherwise, I'd like to think wherever you are, you'll be by my side as I embark on a new journey of sorts.
I hope I make proud.
I hope I can spread kindness and happiness the way you did.
I also hope you're happy and at peace.
Thank you for being the greatest grandad. I'm not sure about what I did to deserve you, but I'm so grateful for all the years, all the jokes, all the conversations, all the food, just all the tiny things we shared together.
I will never and can't ever forget you.
Love you forever.
Without Wax,
Your Sanakka
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